Friday, 31 May 2013
Wednesday, 29 May 2013
Sunday, 26 May 2013
Friday, 24 May 2013
I wrote it a while ago during a sad few minutes but didn't share it with you. These were just the things that popped into my head at that time. I don't think the list quite portrays how much I missed those things at that very moment. I'm not sure why I'm posting it now but perhaps gives an insight into all areas of life with a chronic illness...
- I miss the freedom of a healthier life.
- I miss doing things for other people.
- I miss my work.
- I miss having the opportunity to go to the gym and to be athletic.
- I miss wearing trainers and sports gear and being healthy and spritely.
- I miss dancing even if nobody else was on the dance floor.
- I miss running for the train.
- I miss nipping to the supermarket.
- I miss impromptu nights out or days with friends that turn into nights of laughing and dancing.
- I miss staying up late to watch something on television.
- I miss jogging with music blasting in my ears.
- I miss being able to pull my weight.
- I miss being Anna.
- I miss the time when people didn't have to adapt and tread on egg shells and bend over backwards for me
- I miss unloading the dishwasher.
- I miss fending for myself.
- I miss being able to do things spur of the moment or last minute.
- I miss my life.
- I miss my role.
- I miss driving to see my friends.
- I miss having the freedom to stay out all day.
- I miss making plans.
- I miss being able to take things for granted.
- I miss being able to keep plans and not having to worry whether I'll have to cancel them.
- I miss being more than an illness.
- I miss that Friday feeling.
- I miss running up the stairs or taking the stairs two at a time.
- I miss having days that are more than managing to get out of bed.
- I miss being able to walk into town.
- I miss being able to do more than one thing a day, a week, a month.
- I miss wearing clothes that aren't super-baggy just because I have to go for comfort.
- I miss being able to multitask.
- I miss being able. Full stop.
Wednesday, 22 May 2013
Tuesday, 21 May 2013
Monday, 20 May 2013
Sunday, 19 May 2013
You can also find them on iTunes. They're serious stuff!
Saturday, 18 May 2013
Thursday, 16 May 2013
Tuesday, 14 May 2013
Well, we all knew it was coming.
My brother tells me I'm acting like I'm stoned. Of course I'm not! I'm Anna Jones! I do imagine this is what it would be like though. I'm so 'out of it' from over-exertion. It's been an incredibly uncomfortable day. I can't lie on my back because it makes the room spin. It can't sit up straight because I feel dizzy. The nausea is horrendous. It feels like I've run a marathon without having trained for it beforehand.
The first day after doing something is always the calm before the storm. My body tries to lure me into a false sense of security and them BAM! Day Two is unimaginable. You couldn't make this stuff up. Day Two is always when the fun really begins. NOT! At least I can see a pattern now, two and a half years in.
You never quite get used to the worst of it though. Even when you prepare yourself for it and anticipate its arrival, it takes you by surprise and dampens your spirit. Remember when you were little and you'd cry when you felt poorly? I do that now. I'm not sad, just so desperately unwell and so sometimes I cry. Poor old me!
M.E is different to most other illnesses. I believe you can't fight it. You have to let it win. You have to give in and listen to your body instead of soldiering on. And then you work with it to recover. So that's where I'm at today. My body and brain served me so well over the weekend and now I'm showing my appreciation by letting it do as it wishes, namely collapse in a heap. Mr Body is having the mother of all tantrums after being made to do so much in just one day. It's too early to try to appease the situation. I'm just letting them throw all of their toys out of the pram for now. They did me proud. We really are like three separate entities now that M.E has come along. The three of us are rarely on the same page.
It's not all bad. I'm looking through the photos from the weekend and able to use my iPad in short stints. I'm also in the middle of a Shrek Marathon (I think I'm starting to find him attractive. I've clearly been out of the dating game for too long!) and I'm sporting a lovely pair of Christmas socks. They rarely fail at lifting my spirits. Here's to a better day tomorrow, and then a better day after that...
Monday, 13 May 2013
|It would have been silly not to have cake for breakfast...|
We ditched the Garden Party idea and moved everything inside. Nearly 30 of our closest friends and family gathered together to drink copious cups of tea and scoff ridiculous amounts of cake, all in aid of The M.E. Association.
Sunday 12th May = M.E. Awareness Day. I went all out and embraced the colour scheme.
The virtual party went down well too! Lots of people entered the little quiz I'd posted earlier in the week and I'll get the scores added up and let you know who the winner is later this week.
I can't thank you all enough. Not just for yesterday but for your continued love and support and friendship.
I'm not sure how I imagined yesterday would go but with a total of over £200 raised, just from eating cake, well it's just wonderful!
I think I was more interested in the raising awareness side of things. By hosting a charity event I think it brought it home to people that M.E. IS a real, worthy cause. I felt a bit miffed after I'd managed to have a shower and get dressed (for the first time in a few days) because my body decided that it was done for the day. The party hadn't even started! I don't think the nerves and adrenaline and anticipated helpedd. But a bit of purple time later and I was able to enjoy the day. I think I even came across as a normal, functioning human being. I had a wonderful day with my favourite people. Let's not dwell on the payback just yet...
I tried to do an informative video post last night but, after many attempts at forming coherent sentences, this was the best I could do, tired, croaky voice and all!
Friday, 10 May 2013
|All things blue - party prep|
See you all on Sunday!
Tuesday, 7 May 2013